Here is a simple tip to begin opening up the beliefs of people who are 100% certain of something. It is a bit of a Ninja move. And it is just a beginning, so use it with care and some playfulness.
Pick anything that you or another are sure about.
I will not use some of the crazy things that people have told me in the political realm over the years such as Michelle Obama is a drag queen or that Donald Trump is a space alien. Shall I even mention the people who still think the earth is flat?
I will pick something a bit more mundane: TMJ pain.
In my experience, some people think that TMJ pain can be cured with surgery. I have read enough peer-reviewed research to know that there is little evidence to support surgery for TMJ pain. It has very little chance of working.
Are you sure about that?
So someone says, “I have to get surgery to cure my TMJ pain. It is the only thing that can work. I have tried everything and surgery is all that is left.”
Me: “Are you sure about that?”
The person: “Yes, two surgeons told me that I have to get surgery and I trust them.”
Me: “Are you sure that you are sure?”
The person: “Yes! Of course, I just told you that.”
Me: “Are you so sure that you would be willing to consider other possibilites?”
The person after a bit of hesitation and confusion: “Yes, I am certain enough to consider other possibilities.”
Do you see the pattern?
Either answer that they give will open them to considering more information. If they say, “No I am not sure enough” they are saying their certainty isn’t strong enough (making them unsure). And if they say, “Yes I am sure enough to be unsure” they are still opening themselves to consider more information.
Other Examples
You are an aware person? Feldenkrais makes you aware? Meditation makes you aware?
Does it make you aware enough to realize that there are things you are unaware of?
Somatics make you a mature person? Are you sure about that? Completely sure?
Does it make you mature enough to see where you might be immature?
(If you didn´t see the audio player above, click that to hear a slightly different version of this post. Hearing the pattern can make it clearer. I am not completely sure about that…but I am reasonably sure.
:)
Peace!